Shugo Chara!

I'm still up!! It's 2.10 am.. And I'm still watching anime.. heehee..

But I can't help it because it is so cute and funny! If you like cutesy girly animes, go try this. =)

*Warning: People who doesn't like cutesy girly things may die of Overload of cuteness!

Rawr~!

I'm feeling soooooooo broke right now.. Simply having fun with my life and picking up the pieces which have been lost or gone during this long period of absence, as a friend would say.

Anyways, haven't really been doing much, just catching up with friends and did some shopping. And I realised that retail therapy is AWESOME! I've never had so much fun shopping and spending money. My body was kinda just running on 2 hours of sleep because I stayed out late the previous night and had work in the morning. Was totally tired and even fell asleep while waiting for Debs, but I managed to stay out until 8 in the evening.

-----

A hectic week ahead for me. Signed up for Exotic Dance on Thursday and I am so excited! Also scheduling gym time, because I like how you feel after, especially when you exercise all those muscles you never knew existed on your body which totally hurts but feels so good at the same time. Might be going for Yoga with mom on Wednesday night.

By the way, I've signed up for a Foundation Course on Biomedical Science and I got a spot! I'm so excited and happy! Gonna work hard for this damn thing. Feeling a little scared because I haven't studied for so long, and also the fact I've never taken human biology before. Good thing I have smart friends who I can look to for help. =)

-----

To everyone who has been concerned for me, I'm alright now. Everything will get better in time. *hugs* I'm learning to stand on my own feet and continuing on my journey. Thanks for all the concern and encouragements.

-----

Taken from the movie Kung Fu Panda, I love this qoute from Master WuGui: 'Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery and Today is a Gift. That is why it is called The Present.'

Everyone have a great week ahead! I know I am. =)

Over and done with...

Just like the title said, I've had enough..

Dumped his stinky ass.

It's official! Mix of emotions but meh, who needs a relationship when you have friends all around you. =)

Lesson learnt. Time to move on now..

Karma sucks!

I'm beginning to think that all the things happening is due to karma.. I'm generally not a very nice person. I'm only nice if people are nice to me. I can be mean, even a bitch when I'm in that kind of mood. Must have been the things I did, the way I treat people, for karma to kick my arse so hard now. I can think of 1 person whom I was a total bitch to, and to that person, I'm so sorry for everything I did. Maybe you can never forgive me or forget what I did, but from the bottom of my tiny black heart, I'm truly sorry.

-----

The thought of being alone truly scares me. The emptiness you feel reverberating throughout is unbearable. Maybe that's why the disgustingly foolish part of me is still holding on to this silly farce of a relationship. I'm tired, so very very tired. But I have to keep going on. Because my life is never gonna end, even without anyone in my life.

One thing for sure is, I love life too much to wanna die for someone. =) I'll be honest and say I have entertained thoughts of suicide, but I know I'll never have the guts to do it.

He said he will have an answer for me by tomorrow. I dunno why I'm still waiting for him though.. I'm always doing stupid things when I'm around him. Love makes people stupid. So does hurt. And pain. Oh whatever.. I'm ranting now..

It's almost the weekend now, I hope everyone have a great weekend. =)

Today is...

The 2nd day. I'm feeling much better than I did yesterday. Was constantly having anxiety attacks, and towards the evening I just couldn't bear it anymore.. Was at work and feeling so tired and emotional, just I want to just crawl into a hole, cry and never come out.

But I felt better when I came back home. Was talking to all these frens I had on Msn who were concerned about me. I never knew I had so many frens who cared. =) And guess what, theres no more restrictions in my life now. So I can talk to and go out with whoever I want.

It's now time for me to walk forward, because my life doesn't stop. It's still going and I'm gonna keep going. =)

Thanks everyone who cared about me, and been there for me when I needed a hand to hold while I go through the darkest moments.

I hope I'm over the darkest moments as soon as possible, so I can be happy.

-----

Tattoo - Jordin Sparks


Lyrics:

oh oh oh

No matter what you say about love
I keep coming back for more
Keep my hand in the fire
Sooner or later I get what I’m asking for

No matter what you say about life
I learn every time I bleed
The truth is a stranger
Soul is in danger I gotta let my spirit be free
To admit that I’m wrong and then change my mind
Sorry but I have to move on and leave you behind

I can’t waste time so give it a moment
I realize nothings broken
No need to worry about everything I’ve done
Live every second like it was my last one
Don’t look back got a new direction
I loved you once, needed protection
You’re still a part of everything I do
You’re on my heart just like a tattoo
Just like a tattoo
I’ll always have you (I'll always have you)

Sick of playing all of these games
It’s not about taking sides
When I looked in the mirror didn’t deliver
It hurt enough to think that I could stop
Admit that I’m wrong and then change my mind
Sorry but I’ve gotta be strong and leave you behind

I can’t waste time so give it a moment
I realize nothings broken
No need to worry about everything I’ve done
Live every second like it was my last one
Don’t look back got a new direction
I loved you once, needed protection
You’re still a part of everything I do
You’re on my heart just like a tattoo
Just like a tattoo
I’ll always have you (I'll always have you)

If I live every moment
Won’t change any moment
There's still a part of me in you
I will never regret you
Still the memory of you
Marks everything I do, oh

I can’t waste time so give it a moment
I realize nothings broken (yeah)
No need to worry about everything I’ve done
Live every second like it was my last one
Don’t look back got a new direction (don't look back)
I loved you once, needed protection (no, no)
You’re still a part of everything I do
You’re on my heart just like a tattoo

I can’t waste time so give it a moment (i can't waste time)
I realized nothings broken
No need to worry about everything I’ve done (no need to worry)
Live every second like it was my last one
Don’t look back at got a new direction (don't you ever look back)
I loved you once and I needed protection
You’re still a part of everything I do
You’re on my heart just like a tattoo
Just like a tattoo
I’ll always have you

-----

Really like this song, especially the part where she says that she realises that nothing is broken. Maybe just my heart, but time heals all scars I hope. =) Enjoy... Have a great week ahead~!

Random thought - I feel like getting a small tattoo.. LoL.. Any idea what I should get? Heehee, comments are welcomed..

It's 3.12 am...

And guess wat.. I'm gonna take one step at a time..

Already prepared myself and I've lived without him for most of our relationship. I think I'm not gonna miss him too much. Because of him, I've lost my identity. Not totally his fault but god am I stupid to actually let that happen.

I have a plan in life now, whether or not he's in it. I'm not gonna be that pathetic girl that clings on to a dead relationship.

Because of all the things I know, I think I've been mind-fucked enough as it is. It's good that I found out about everything, because it helped me realise there's no point trying to make things work when he's giving up.

Since he's no longer interested, why stay...? I've shed my last tear for this relationship already..

I'm gonna embark on the rest of my journey.. with or without him...

And that is my final answer..

One Step At a Time..

Lyrics:

da da da um da da
da da da ba um da da
da da da um da da
da da da ba um da da

Hurry up and wait
So close, but so far away
Everything that you always dreamed of
Close enough for you to taste
But you just can't touch

HOOK
You wanna show the world but no one knows yours name yet
Wonderin' when, where and how you're going to make it
You know you can if you get the chance
In your face and the door keeps slamming
Now you're feeling more and more frustrated
And you getting all kinda impatient
Waiting, we live and we learn

CHORUS
To take one step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly, or falling in love
It's gonna happen when it's supposed to happen
And we find the reasons why
One step at a time

da da da um da da
da da da ba um da da
da da da um da da
da da da ba um da da

You believe, and you doubt
You're confused, and got it all figured out
Everything that you always wished for
Could be yours, should be yours, would be yours
If they only knew

HOOK
You wanna show the world but no one knows yours name yet
Wonderin' when, where and how you're going to make it
You know you can if you get the chance
In your face and the door keeps slamming
Now you're feeling more and more frustrated
And you getting all kinda impatient
Waiting, we live and we learn

CHORUS
To take one step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly, or falling in love
It's gonna happen when it's supposed to happen
And we find the reasons why
One step at a time

When you can't wait any longer (you can't wait)
But there's no end in time (when you need to find the strength)
It's your faith that makes you stronger (the only way we get there)
The only way we get there
Is one step at a time

To take one step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly, or falling in love (Falling in love)
It's gonna happen when it's supposed to happen
And we find the reasons why
One step at a time

One step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly, or falling in love (Falling in love)
It's gonna happen when it's supposed to happen
And we find the reasons why
One step at a time

-----

Good song.. I love the heels too.. Yum~! All the videos cannot be put up.. So go to Youtube to check it out.. for the green heels... =)