Pros and cons..

Sometimes, I feel life would be much easier and simpler when one is single. There are many things a single person will not have to worry about when one isn't in a relationship.

But then again... When one is single, there is a lot of things they cannot get from being in a relationship..

Maybe it's true what they say, the grass is always greener on the other side. But when you get to the other side, you might feel that, your side was probably just as good as the other side..

Sigh..

How can people feel loved and unloved at the same time?

Highs and Lows

A friend once commented that I am a very emotion-driven person. When I am happy, I am all the way on the top.. But when I feel down, I really feel like I hit rock bottom..

So I said goodbye to my dear friend today at his funeral. There were so many people present. If only he would pick up the phone and call any 600 of us to talk. But he already made his choice, and there's nothing we can do. I feel so sad for his family, and the people who loved him, including our circle of friends, who have been crying our eyes out ever since we found out.

Makes you evaluate what is truly important in your life and what's not. Maybe if he learn not to care so much, he might not feel like he's all alone, and do something drastic.

Because I am emotionally driven, sometimes when I feel down, I do feel like taking my own life. But I know I could never do it, because of all the people I love. However, if I were sick with depression, maybe all I can think of is to end everything to solve all my problems.

Sigh, seeing a friend leave us so early, makes me sad.

Maybe I should learn to numb myself. If I'm numb, I will not hurt as much. Getting hurt by the people you love is probably the most devastating thing that can happen to another human being.. And if I dun get hurt, I will be alive..

R.I.P My dearest friend, Tze Xian

A friend of mine ended his life today.

Many emotions are going through me now. Disbelief and anger are the most prominent ones. However, he made his choice and there's nothing anyone can do now but to respect his choice.

We used to be really close friends, but then circumstances changed but we still catch up once in a while. He was always a happy-go-lucky person like me. No matter what happens, he will always have this cheeky smile on. Whether he be emo or neutral. He loved to sing, and he loved to sing songs that are full of longing for love.

There's a lot of what ifs going on in our circle of friends who knew him. Why he did what he did, and how we could all have helped to prevent this ending. But I think he already decided what he wanted to do.

Since nothing can be undone, all I can say to him is...

To my dearest Tze Xian,

Even though we haven't been friends for a long time, I will always treasure our special friendship. I will sincerely miss all your smiles, your laughter, your silly grins and I will miss all the times we shared.

I hope that where ever you are right now, you have found peace from what you were trying to run away from. I think God must have needed you right away, which is why he took you away from us.

But I know, I will see you again eventually. So I will be waiting for that day, when I will get to meet you again. We will have so much to catch up on. =)

You will always be in my heart because of the friendship I have with you.

A friend who will truly miss your company,
Inky

Disgusted

I am thoroughly disgusted by cheating spouses.

A local semi-famous and pretty respected film director in Singapore, who is married for 27 years and has 4 kids with her, has been exposed by the mistress. He has admitted to the 2 year affair with a model who is less than half his age. An article about it can be seen here.

If there is anything I really hate, it's cheating spouses. By cheating on your other half, you are breaking the promise you made to her when you first get married. If there's any kids involved, it would be making a fool out of the family.

What's more, the model is not that much of a looker. She is just young and thinks that she is hot. I don't understand how some home-wrecker can become famous overnight.

I can never trust an infidelity from my partner. Firstly, I will never be able to forget and forgive him. Secondly, I will always envision them in my head while they are together, and laughing at me for being a fool. Thirdly, I will never be able to trust him around females again.

So if anything were to happen, it would be the end of everything we had. Whether married or with kids, I will still leave.

Sigh, rant over..

Off to get some sleep now..

Nites everyone and have a good week ahead!

A series of unfortunate events

This is what I can piece together from the circumstances leading to her untimely demise.

The little Bum, who constantly has prison break on her mind, succeeded a 2nd time on the fateful morning of 23rd February. Somehow, making her way into my kitchen, she found a hole that leads to a covered pipe, which is connected to the sinks. Being a hoarder by nature, I guessed she somehow explored the kitchen area and picked up food which she proceeded to bring back to her nice snug hole.

That same afternoon, my mom was in the kitchen and was doing some dishes when suddenly, water gushed out of that hole my Bum called her new home, because apparently, Bum got the pipe STUCK! Trying to stop the water from flowing, she saw a wet head pop out and immediately thought: 'RAT!'.

Well, what happened next was, my mom (armed with a plastic bag to protect her hand and to use as a glove) picked the Bum up, and threw her into the rubbish chute outside, all the while thinking it was a black, smelly ugly rat.

Sigh... Imagine my surprise when I came home from work that evening to find the tank empty. What was worst was the fact, when my mom came home and I asked her, she told me the 'rat' incident.

When I told my brother what happened, he asked the exact same questions as I did..

'Did you see a tail?'
'Doesn't hamster have tail?'

'Was it moving super fast, was slow as hell?'
'It was moving slowly, but maybe cause it got wet?'

Sigh.. This is what happens when you live at home with parents who cannot differentiate pets from pest...

I need to get a stronger and escape-proof cage..

Bad year for me this year.. Sigh..

Bad start of the tiger year..

For this tiger at least...

Sigh.

I have been having a streak of very bad luck, and to top it off, making it the worst week ever...

My hamster is gone...

Sigh...

Feel so sad.. =(

Really need to go and pray to appease the bad luck god and hope I get through this year with no mishaps..

It's my birthday~!

So I turn 24 today..

It is also the 4th day of the Lunar New Year. I took the day off, so I dun have to be super busy today at work (because of all the people who wants to take a sickie off work for a longer holidays) and enjoy my birthday.

Turning another year old actually makes a just a tiny bit of difference. Like how much older I feel now... And mentally, I feel much more mature compared to before..

Today was a nice quiet day spent with the BF.

I woke up pretty late, and was greeted by these 2 extremely red eggs. Haha..

Traditionally, one would get a bowl of mien sien/mee suah in soup cooked with an egg, usually eaten by the birthday person on their special day. The BF didn't know how to make it, so he cooked hardboiled eggs instead. Haha.. Oh well, it was a nice thought and I ate both of them up.. =)

After that, we went over to Ikea and had chicken rice at one of the hawker place nearby. It was crowded with many office personnel out for CNY lunch too. When we were done, we headed over to Ikea to try to find ourselves a computer table big enough for both of our computers. Spent about 2 hours total there. Wanted to have their famous meatballs, but because we were still pretty stuffed from lunch, we decided to skip it as I was gonna make them again for my weekend gathering with some friends. Total damage for the Ikea trip was $555, which included the table, 2 chairs and some other knick knacks. I love Ikea~!

We went grocery shopping after because BF was gonna make me dinner. Haha.. Took a cab home and then he started making preparations.


It was spinach cheese tortellini in a tomato sauce with olives and garlic. YUM! He put in lots of onions and carrots and it was surprisingly good. He even did the dishes too.. Haha.. I could get used to that.

And just when I thought that was as good as the day could get.. He got me these....



Aww.... So sweet..


This has to be the best birthdays of my whole 24 years of life.. Haha.. I wonder what he is gonna do to top it next year.. =P

Thanks to all for the birthday wishes. =)