The Green Eyed..

Monster has struck yet again. I've been looking through some of my ex-schoolmates pictures on their blogs and I'm feeling extremely jealous of them.

Both of them are studying for their degree in Brisbane. They are doing exactly what I wish I was doing (studying..) and at the place where I want to be right now (Australia). Frankly speaking, I can honestly say I am truly disappointed with myself right now. I'm unsatisfied with my life, my job and myself.

My life because I feel like I'm just wasting my youth away. I'm 22 this year, and what do I have to show for myself? Nothing. I have no aspirations, nothing that I can accomplish while I'm stuck here serving my end of the tuition grant the government offered me. While everyone around me is doing exactly what they want to be doing.


My job because it has no future what-so-ever, and it gives no satisfaction because being in the service line in Singapore, SUCKS. Everyone treats you like shit and just because they are the customers, they think they should be treated like royalty, be given extra privileges over everyone else., as though they are human beings, and other people are not. I swear, you'll meet the worst kinds of people in the service industry, especially when they are sick or pretend to be sick. You'll get the snobbish asses, the stingy money-pinchers and the type who always comes for little illnesses just because their company pays for their medical bills.

Also the fact I seem to be more alone now because I dun hang out with people my own age much. I miss having a huge bunch of friends to hang out with (even though I have never had 'real' friends when I was growing up). I just miss hanging with people my own age, especially when I'm at work. Where I work, you'll see middle-aged people and really old people too. And my colleagues are all females who are all older than me by a LOT and have had KIDS. How do you communicate like that? HUGE GENERATION GAP~!

Lastly, I'm totally disgusted with myself because I am lazy and fat. I have been wanting to lose some weight over the week, and I always find some lame excuse to not do it. What is up with me! I'm 22 but I feel like I am 50! I have constant backaches, I'm putting on weight like a monster, and I feel tired everyday even though I dun do much.

I FEEL SO GROSS!!!!!!! RAWR!!!!!!!!!!!

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Sigh, ok.. Rant over. I think I'm gonna crawl into bed now. Have a great week. Hope it's better than mine.

P.S. I need a makeover in my life. Can someone tell me how? Thanks.